[auntie16]

Hello, I've been wanting to sponsor my mom for over a decade, but she refuses, as she looks after my nephew (13 y.o.) and niece (3 y.o.), from my sister. Before my niece came along, I looked into adopting my nephew. His father used to work with my dad in Saudi, but ever since my dad passed away in 2008, we lost contact from him. My sister, his legal wife, had quarrels with him, on suspected third party, as relayed to her by my late dad. He' calls or shows up, maybe once a year, for a brief moment, without any support for his kid in any form (school, food, healthcare etc.). My sister had no permanent job, so I took over in looking after my nephew financially.

I sought legal guidance on about adopting my nephew, so I could sponsor both him and my mom, so I went home in 2010 to look into this matter. My sister agreed for me to "adopt" her son, if it meant better future for him. I had a chance to meet with my brother-in-law to discuss this proposal and he refused. He had given no solution, but left my nephew with my mom. He only showed up once since then. He had extended no financial support of any kind.

My sister decided to work abroad in Dubai in 2011, only to come back pregnant, early 2013. While she was in Dubai, she was unable to extend any financial support to her son as well. Instead, I have extended financial support to her, her son and to my mom. Now, my mom had to look after my niece and nephew. Soon my nephew will no longer be eligible for adopting (over 15 y.o.). My sister is unable to support her kids, and hardly have enough income to support her own. She now lives with my mom again.

I look after the family's financial needs at home, and in school. I wanted to file an abandonment case to my brother-in-law and possibly my sister as well. I would like for my mom to have full custody of my nephew and niece as she is the one who is acting as a sole parent. Soon, due to age, she will not be able to sustain the physical and mental demands of being a single parent to those 2 kids. My sister now lives with my mom, but lives irresponsibly, totally undependable and unreliable. Would this be enough grounds to file a case, in this way I could take my mom with my nephew and niece.

I cringe on the idea that when the time comes and my mom is gone, my nephew and niece's future will be at stake. Since my dad passed away, I have been assisting my mom in all of her responsibilities and obligations financially, emotionally and mentally. I'm sorry that this is lengthy, but I could not ask the question without putting it into context of the situation. Please advise. Thank you.

[Fr_Chuck]

Make is shorter and ask a question.

Where is this at, what country,

In the US, what state, abandonment is state law in US.

In most it is not paying state ordered child support, so have they filed for child support against father ?

[joypulv]

auntie16
sister with 2 children, and a husband who appears once a year, but no support for the older child he is father to
auntie16 + sister have a mother, who has the 2 children, age 13 and 3
auntie has asked to adopt the 13 year old, but the father refused

What COUNTRY do you live in??? And your mother????
Why hasn't your sister filed for divorce with child support???? Or abandonment, if the laws in your country allow it???

Your story lacks all the details that are important, sorry.

[Oliver2011]

If the sister is in the house she could make the case she is providing some type of nurturing or something for her son and daughter. I would think getting the court to agree to abandonment would be an uphill battle against the mother. The father based on the evidence you provided clearly is not providing anything.

But kudos to you for caring.