Am I making the right decision? (Long story)
I've known my husband since we were kids. We "dated" in our early teen years and lost touch for a while. We were friends mostly but always talked about being together. Until our mid to late 20's we made the decision to give it a try. Since then I have seen a lot of red flags that I've simply ignored. A lot of lying and doing things behind my back and this has made me incredibly insecure. We got married and are coming up on our two year anniversary but I am ready to call it quits. Throughout our marriage there has always been some woman from his past lingering around. I found out last year that when we were dating that his female friend he had been talking to was actually an old hook up, and that he had messaged an ex but deleted the text. And... The dreaded Facebook.
At one point I became so jealous and insecure I began to see who he looked up on Facebook (childish I know) and discovered he obsessively looks up his exes. I told him that hurt me and asked him to stop. I saw that he had been clearing the search so I knew he was still doing it. I ended up blocking all of his exes so he would stop. (Yes it made me that crazy) well I found out he unblocked one. His high school girlfriend of three years that he was supposedly over but I always had a feeling he wasn't. Why was he so obsessed that he went out of his way to unblock her? He's spoken about her before when we were dating about how he loved her but she fell out of love with him and they cheated on each other. He remembers a lot about her even down to the price of a gift he bought her 10 years ago which is weird because he is normally forgetful.
I feel like she was the one and that I'm nobody. The last incident was when he got drunk with his friend and they changed his Facebook password so I could not access it. He must have done something bad because he deleted his Facebook the next day and won't tell me what caused him to do this. I was hurt completely. He said his friend was the one who was on it but that's all I've gotten. Before they changed the password I saw them or him looking up his ex before me and then I was kicked off. And even though this friend hurt me he still is close with him. Maybe I'm wrong but if my friend messed with my marriage and hurt my husband well they aren't my friend anymore. I can see this is getting long so I will wrap it up. I am leaning toward divorce basically because I keep getting hurt and he refuses to accept responsibility and tell the truth which hurts because I am so open. I just don't want to make a mistake if I'm overreacting. I'd like some outside opinions.