[Veryconfused82]

I am only 25 and I have 3 little girls and happily married. Not long after the younest was born we found out I had cervical and uteran cancer. Went through 2 LEAP's and was told it was gone. Well, almost 6 months ago I started having slight pain while having sex, later my right side started to hurt almost to the point I couldn't walk. Went to the local ER and they tested me for EVERYTHING and said I needed to see me family doctor, they had no idea what was wrong with me. Visited the doc, sent to another doc and he said I have a sack of fluid around the outside of the uterus and possibility that cancer had spread into my pelvic bone. He suggested a hysterectomy. Surgey date is set for August 18th. Does sex change afterwards and honestly how bad is this surgery? I have read little bits about it and SCARED SICK... :confused: Any help would be more than greatful:) thanks

[Choux]

I'm from a big city, and your story doesn't sound right... if you are from a small town, you need to go to a big city physician and get evaluated immediately!

Best wishes,

[asking]

I agree. This sounds wrong. Get a second opinion right away, preferably from a specialist in uterine oncology (cancer). If you have insurance, they should cover a second opinion. If they won't, get another opinion anyway. This is important. At most, it'll cost a few hundred dollars.

A hysterectomy can change your sex life, although it depends on how it's done and how you react to it. You don't want one you don't need. And you definitely don't want one INSTEAD of what you do need. You need more information.

Good luck!

[smoothy]

I'll also recommend getting a second and maybe third opinion... but don't wait, get it ASAP in case they were right. With Cancer many times time is of the essence.

[Veryconfused82]

I have been to see 3 different doctors now and they all say the same thing. The last doc is located in Cincinnati at christ hosp. I am just thinkful I was able to have my 3 babies that I have now..

[asking]

I'm really sorry. But if three different doctors think you need a hysterectomy, it sounds like that's the answer. Do you know yet for sure if the cancer has spread to bones or anywhere else? Will they treat that too?

Thinking of you.

[Xrayman]

Okay you may well need this surgery, but has any of your doctors asked for a nuclear medicine scan of the uterus/pelvis? As in whole body bone scan? ASK for one this will tell the doctors the degree of agressiveness (if it it cancer), and give you the absolute best possible outcome-they need to know for sure about the spreading or lack of to your pelvis.

At the very least a CT of your pelvis should be done-PUSH FOR IT! Then get the hysterectomy if that is the recommended oncological treatment required-

Best wishes!

[asking]

Veryconfused,
You sent me a private message that I cannot answer because your account is set not to receive private messages. If you change that, I will answer!

Anyway, good luck!

[xoxaprilwine]

Go through with the surgery; the LEEP's failed and there usually is not much more they can do once its spread. I have been through the same ordeal but I have been told that I am clean as of 1 year ago and have a baby and another one on the way. I really wish you the best and a speedy recovery. Here is some reading information I thought you might find helpful.

Hysterectomy - Sex After Surgery - Hysterectomy Recovery

[Ash123]

You may need HRT (hormone replacement therapy) to compensate.

Since that is controversial these days, you may abstain, and try other things. A qualified obgyn or GP can weigh in over time at a good hospital.

Side effects: you may discover you are "less moist" before sex and your desire needs a little push sometimes - but these things are small compared to risking your life.

And yes, you are lucky to have your kids all by now if you cannot have more!

[asking]

I think it's lucky they caught the cancer and you can be treated and be around for your kids. They need you.

I lived alone with my two kids and needed major surgery--a spinal fusion. I emailed every single person in my family and said I needed help. I was so lucky. One of my nieces quit her job and came and lived with me for 4 months. After that, my kids who were 15 and 11 did their best and we got by. Looking back, I think it was really good for my kids to have to help take care of me and of themselves. They grew up a lot. I was divorced so after my niece left, there was no other adult at all, so I also got help from three of my friends, who would bring groceries or just visit. I owe them so much. BUT I had to learn to ask for help from people, which I'd never really done before. It was a learning experience.

As for pain, don't be afraid. I don't know much about hysterectomies, but I'm assuming full recovery is a few months? Doctors are very good now about treating pain. The nurses will probably tell you to manage the pain. Take the drugs that keep the pain at bay and you will heal faster. Don't be afraid of addiction. Most people who take pain drugs do not become addicted if they take them as directed and don't abuse them.

Be strong! You have already come through a lot and you will come through this and your family will be there with you.

Here are some threads at this forum where people have asked about hysterectomies and sex. These are all people who had problems, so not representative. People with no problems don't write... of course.

https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/adult-...t=hysterectomy

https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/adult-...t=hysterectomy

https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/adult-...t=hysterectomy

https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/adult-...t=hysterectomy

https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/adult-...t=hysterectomy

Don't know if it will be possible to keep your ovaries, but you could ask if you haven't already. I know that's desirable...

Take care.