[smoolson05]

While I was at worked the babysitter allowed a relative come over and my 5 year old son witnessed this boy putting hbis finger in her privates. I am horriffied. Can this boy be charged, I am taking my daughter to be examined to confrim the story

[grammadidi]

I am so sorry for what your family has gone through, and likely will go through. It's a stressful and difficult thing. Please be sure to surround yourself with support for both you and your children.

In my opinion if a child reports they were molested (or that they witnessed some type of sexual abuse) you have to take it seriously. It is better to err on the side of caution. Unfortunately, not all sexual abuse can be proved. Regardless, I would report this to the police and your family doctor immediately. I would ask your family doctor to be referred to someone who specifically deals with child sexual abuse.

When my adopted daughter became verbal she disclosed sexual, physical, emotional abuse and neglect to us. We took her to a Suspected Child Abuse and Neglect program at the local Children's Hospital. We also contacted Children's Services and the Police. It was a very difficult time for us all. There was no physical evidence of the abuse, but after a lengthy investigation it was determined that she was definitely abused and neglected. Unfortunately, there was not enough evidence to justify an arrest.

I think that your daughter, and probably her 5 year old brother, needs to speak to someone who is experienced in dealing with such issues. The situation witnessed and experienced by your children will be with them for the rest of their lives. Appropriate counselling is necessary now to help teach them (and perhaps you) how to deal with what happened... not only now, but later in life. There will be triggers that may open the memories of the experience. They may need to revisit therapy again at key points in their lives. Learning how to speak about it now will enable them to better deal with it later.

Only the police will determine if the young lad who touched her will be charged. My guess is that they may charge him and agree to suspend sentence as long as he goes to counselling himself. It is very possible he was acting out because he has been sexually abused. That is why it is imperative to follow up and include the police in the process.

It is imperative that your children know that they have done nothing wrong. Some people may tell you that your daughter will forget it. We are pretty sure that my daughter's sexual abuse was from birth to age 4. She is 21 now and it still affects her life every single day. Do what you feel is right in your heart. Get every bit of help that you can.

I hope this helps.

Hugs, Didi

[Fr_Chuck]

I guess I don't understand why the police have not already been called, that would have been my call within a couple minutes of hearing it

[tickle]

Why did you not call the police immediately !